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DecrepitI dial the wires

(infatuated with disease
I let you molest me
while my hoarse breath
groans down your throat.
you make me pant
like a dog
sweating from
the heat
you stuffed
my heart with.
can't you moan
a little sweeter?
you're a
blinking-back-bastard;
no remorse  
pangs of conscious
fade into your
holy bullshit)

to send you to me.

                             
Sickif I could  bad-mouth
my body, I'd shoot down the
punchline from my en-
trails and my health should get help
trying to inhale hunger.
(Heated) Water and I told her;
water won't waste gravity.

she breathed in
scraps of a
wonderful life,
until she melted
down.

(she loved to swim -
sea-burns & headaches;
the way it made
her smile, she
couldn't stop)

her clammy breaths
enraptured
humidity,
as heat felt her
up.

(she wanted to drown -
wayward & dehydrated;
this time it made
her energy
stagnate)  

and I told her;
water won't waste gravity.
Parchedhalf-shuttered eyes
stutter, waiting
to just -  

found sleep past-noon.
(my bed is smoking -
dry summer.
I soak in this fire;
matches stroke
my body. too tired.

wasting saliva
and dripping
off my skin -
cough on breaths
as I lay back; choking.

fireman calls out
no remorse.)

sirens get hotter soon;
left in the hallway,
waiting to just --
Ofelia(picked-at dreams
crumble in my
fingers,
turning into
iron petals)

sun strips my eyes
so I can see
through air
(you let me forget)
but gravity kicks
in so I can be
born again.  

and when insects
crawl into my skin,
I fall back;
my lips still sweat
a taste of
butterflies,
dripping.

daddy, when will
I ever wake up?
sore and dysphoriaI pluck out my hair,
head never ached this much before;
it pulls down my conscious
to a fever of dysphoria.
(please let me tear off the
skin that feels so tight)

growths sprout like blisters
on my chest; they keep swelling
and it's cramped -- my torso
isn't formed right, so I let
my ribs wear one layer of an
organ-coating, binding me.
(I can hardly breathe,
but I'd love to taste the air)

my body is one itch I can't
scratch out and I can't
watch it peel away but
I still hope for that day.
(this is not what I'm meant to be)
Smoke Silhouettes stained the sidewalk;
They're right under the surface.
Focus lost on the sick  site,
While fire leaks out the headlights.

Colors streaming  the dark.
They always could get by
Dreaming back to the start.

You act just like a nurse;
Burning needles.
No, we're not gonna reverse;
Turning riddles.

Plastic melts panic in pills as
Wireless brains recoil.
Infected eyes look to paralyze;
Let the maggots eat you alive.

Skull ridden with good times.
We'll bake in the sunlight
And try to mirror this life.

You act just like a nurse;
Burning needles.
No, we're not gonna reverse;
Turning riddles.

Somethi
Transformcat-to-fish dreams—
      bowl of water;
               breathe.
Summer HeatSummer heat clenches her shame,
Sunlight aches her whole body,
She has it in her pocket.
Sweat runs like an itch for her name,
It shakes her awake to the same shame.

Planted health helps her
Bask in the heat, melting.
Day skies weep to keep
Her head sick and quick.

Butterflies live in her stomach,
Minding her forced life.
Butterflies live in her stomach,
Eating her alive.
She hopes this is the last time.

She wants to breathe in sea-salt,
Waiting for water to waste her,
Weighs her down as she walks.
But she makes it chlorine's fault,
Maybe she'll sleep faster in this salt.

Drenched air stains her pale
As she steps down, choking.
TemponautSundays: no one's butterflies are
going to affect the wavelength
of the sun magnifying ants
(nothing will happen anyway).

Rewind, the air wrinkles into
sundays: no one's butterflies are
stuck on weeping quicklime (not yet)
that doesn't hesitate; floor it.  

High-pitched tires are slashed by the
hissing water, parked sometime on
sundays: no one's butterflies are
run over by broken sunshine.

One last time to make this right, keep
blinking back - stop flapping its wings
'fore they reek like pelting rain from
sundays: no one's butterflies are...
I'll be honestSince I started uploading to soundcloud, I'm sure you've noticed my voice is high. I think I owe you all an explanation; I really don't want you guys to think the wrong thing. (I really never wanted to tell you all this anyways. Mostly because I love passing, but I also fear people won't like me after I tell them) I'll just be blunt; I'm transgender. Female to male.
I'm too young to transition, and my parents would never give me hormone blockers, so I'm in a rut for the right hormones until I leave my parent's house. I really hate it, but I'll live.
I'm ranting now. Sorry I don't like talking about things like this. Makes me feel weak for some reason.
...
So, on another note, I've been learning about the 1920's and 1930's at school. It's really awesome! I find those two decades to be very fascinating. My class was assigned a project (history class) to cover those two decades in a creative way. My group, which consists of two people, chose to make a movie. This is slightly ridiculous be
Holy Sunday Wakes UpI. Sometimes she'd want to
sink into the earth
just to get away from
what she thinks is the worst.
“What's so funny with peace,
love, and understanding?”

But she loves to hate,
preaching it all day –
She denies that it's real
and something from birth;
She uses religion as a shield
and tries to heal this nature
called “perverse”.

II. And if Holy Sunday wakes up
thinking the verse is out-dated
and the black-and-white world's fading,
will it shake love back to the preachers?

Or will they marry their hatred,
the next worst thing?

III. Tell me there will freedom,
what our forefathers agreed on.
Tell me there wi
Pasting Skini.
magazines make words
spin into the
skin that holds
you tight -
the chlorophyll
sets in. (your mind & get born into something new,
             you're only ugly)
ii.
silicon people fade
into plastic,
as you plaster
yourself in the
same sick thing. (get stuck in your head, you'll never get out,
                       you're only ugly)
iii.
pasting a smile
on your face
only makes -
they laugh,
"you're only half-ugly."

| | |

they laugh;
you cut
off your head. (you haven't thought in awhile)
Bloody Bowelsthe soil is spoiled
filthy oils stain
earth's mind
sprouting dirty dreams.

forehead thinks,
forecasting lands
will be milked
by the planet's bile.
(universe takes years
to puke it out;
world hunger ends)

let the whole
globe dream;
blinks grow longer
breaths groan slower,
what a wonderful world.

choke its throat
and let the air
sleep (with it);
water trickles
down its spine --

the earth is leaking.
for evelynmy how he loves his evelyn so;

(can’t you feel the ricochet of his heart my dear-)

swallowing secrets; feel white wined lips & hold her soft for another kiss

slipping fingers; feel hands uneven (so perfectly though)

shimmer its bittersweet-

(baby blanket scars from daffodil-touched smiles in motions slow & sun ending pearls that breathed colors true)

kissing her again back to sleepless dreams all spotted in glitter salt & june bud limbs

(give her more tea speckled with sweet evergreen)

my she’s a beautiful dreamer isn’t she?

my evelyn
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More from =slowslicksnails

Pasting Skini.
magazines make words
spin into the
skin that holds
you tight -
the chlorophyll
sets in. (your mind & get born into something new,
             you're only ugly)
ii.
silicon people fade
into plastic,
as you plaster
yourself in the
same sick thing. (get stuck in your head, you'll never get out,
                       you're only ugly)
iii.
pasting a smile
on your face
only makes -
they laugh,
"you're only half-ugly."

| | |

they laugh;
you cut
off your head. (you haven't thought in awhile)
Shut in Tightcongested airways cut off

(filtered thoughts can't
catch me I'm fading
into my ribcage
since my chest
is beating on
disordered blinks
look like dialect
that I won't breathe in
because I'm
close to stifled
and my spinal
cords want to tangle
with my brain)

access to breathe.
Shrinefound sleep past noon;
and dream of viole(n)t
hues that took over you.

one match box
(you loved the way it hurt)
to singe off your hair,
and keep your body parched,
this last time.

you wasted away that night,
as I watched in pleasure.
(you told me to get off
of you once
and I did)

my sight stripped you bare,
as I devote myself to you forever.

I hope you'd tire me,
(I should kick you for
feeding me into addiction)
but I'm never weary,
not this soon.

can't keep my eyes shut -
my mouth wakes me up,
"you're just drowsy
today - yesterday - tomorrow."

(I only think of you)

please don't let me see inside,
please don't let me see my
DecrepitI dial the wires

(infatuated with disease
I let you molest me
while my hoarse breath
groans down your throat.
you make me pant
like a dog
sweating from
the heat
you stuffed
my heart with.
can't you moan
a little sweeter?
you're a
blinking-back-bastard;
no remorse  
pangs of conscious
fade into your
holy bullshit)

to send you to me.

                             
Between Dead and Diseasedsix minutes
wasted me -
put on mute,
muffled
and bare. (it's a 'nothing preview')

cut off at 3:45.

so I breathe another day,
because some kind of necrophillia
makes me wanna [die]
get born again.
One Fine Daythe nurse who loved me
wakes up undone.
(she makes me swallow
something called the
wonderful life -
sex brought the disease)
her pillowhead mind
is blank - daylight blinds her eyes.

I fall asleep next to
her and enjoy the silence.

her comfort
makes me forget
the holy bullshit.
(washed out screen man
is her saturday savior)
muffled snaps from volume
shoot down in my veins. (small crimes)
I'm her empty friend sometimes.

she's too much
and I won't wake up.

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February 25
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Part-Time Hooker

:iconslowslicksnails:

I inhale smoke and dirty thoughts

(sleeping with a waste-of-calories
with no sex appeal. her heart
doesn't beat
 the volume of
smell increases as it's
getting hotter than a
 fever heat
 I don't mind her
cold hands around my --
 burned out lights form a
silhouette; film this on
screen like a dream
you can watch or hear.
but she doesn't scream;  
her bones suffocate me
as she's wrapped around
my body -
she's stiff, cold, dry.
sleeping with a waste-of-calories
with no sex appeal. her heart
doesn't beat. )

Until I can't breathe.
:iconslowslicksnails:
I thank Betty Blowtorch for the inspiration to write this. [link]

Edit: First ever DLD! Thank you all for your support. :heart:
Edit: Wow, first ever Daily Deviation... Thank you so much for ~panicphotoofyou & ^NicSwaner for featuring my piece. You both made my day! Wow, this is unbelievable...

(took off mature content warning...not sure if it needs it? If it does then tell me and I'll put it back)
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Daily Deviation

Given 2013-04-13
Part-Time Hooker by ~slowslicksnails had the suggester saying: It's like thoughts, the poem can be interpreted in so many different ways which makes it even better. ( Suggested by ~panicphotoofyou and Featured by ^NicSwaner )
love 7 7 joy 5 5 wow 7 7 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:iconisischneider:
*isischneider 4 days ago   Photographer
very cold,although good work.
Reply
:iconschriftsteller:
~schriftsteller Apr 29, 2013   Writer
Ah, the style really reminds me of e.e. cummings' work. How there are three poems in one. I like that. The idea and imagery are also very nice-- I never thought I'd say that about a poem featuring hookers, but you know ha. This is really fantastic. Great work!
Reply
:iconslowslicksnails:
=slowslicksnails Apr 29, 2013  Student Writer
Wow, e.e. Cummings...that's a first and a very high compliment! Thank you so much for your lovely compliments; it means so much. :heart: (and thank you for adding this to your favorites!)
Reply
:iconschriftsteller:
~schriftsteller May 2, 2013   Writer
You're quite welcome. I really did enjoy this one. :)
Reply
:iconslowslicksnails:
=slowslicksnails May 5, 2013  Student Writer
Thank you so much again! :)
Reply
:iconschriftsteller:
~schriftsteller May 7, 2013   Writer
Of course. :)
Reply
:iconjade-pandora:
`jade-pandora Apr 22, 2013
:worship: Hello! This wonderful piece of yours has been featured here: [link]
Reply
:iconslowslicksnails:
=slowslicksnails Apr 22, 2013  Student Writer
Thank you so much for the feature!! This means a ton. :)
Reply
:iconjade-pandora:
`jade-pandora Apr 23, 2013
I'm glad I knew about your work to begin with - and you're welcome!
Reply
:icondraganthemighty:
~DraganTheMighty Apr 17, 2013  New member
So Cold.....
Reply
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